Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Don't be the Dreaded Sister

With VCU being only an hour away from Fredericksburg, I tend to go home every chance that I get. In fact, I think I've only stayed at VCU once over the weekend where I stayed simply to get work done--every other time I've stayed at school over the weekend I've had Regattas or mandatory meetings or something! The weeks I know I'm going home, I definitely look forward to Friday at 11am, when Mom pulls up in the van and we make the quick trip back home!

Growing up as the oldest girl in a large family definitely contributed to me being a tad bit bossy at times. Telling people what to do just comes so naturally for me, which is sometimes a good thing, but can be a bad trait as well. A few weekends ago I went home, and I was trying to help get some things picked up around the house and I wanted the kitchen cleaned up so I could cook something. My bossy side started showing right away, telling the little boys to do various tasks. Obviously, they got annoyed as I asked them to stop their games and clean the dishes, then take the trash out, oh, and put towels away while you are at it. The boys start yelling and making a fuss.

Dad talked to me over that weekend, and told me how important it is for the littler kids to want me to come home for the weekend, and to have it be something to look forward to, not to dread. When I get so caught up in being bossy, they dread me being there. He told me to do more to be the "cherished sister"--after all, they survive throughout the week without me, so putting a few more towels away at the expense of strong sibling relationships obviously isn't worth it. So I thought about that really quickly, and Dad was right.

I stopped bugging the boys, or at least I decreased my various demands, and ended up making banana bread with Harrison and listening to Tanner play his piano songs for me. Everything went so much more smoothly. Now, every time I go home, I always remember what Dad said--don't let me coming home be something to dread.

I love those crazy, messy brothers back home. Harrison texted me the other day about his new goal to do the Couch to 5K running program with Tanner in order to become a better runner. He also started talking about his dentist trip and how they had to pull his teeth. I called Mom and Tanner asked if I'd listen to his new piano song over the phone, so I listened as he fumbled with some of the keys. Ryan told me about making meatballs with Mom (which used to be our job), and how he is now the best cook out of us three. It's funny how right Dad is--when I take a step back from being the boss, and just enjoy the family and being home, everything usually goes pretty great.

I am sure grateful for a Dad who cares to offer his advice in so many different situations, and who cares about having all of us kids establish relationships with each other. It's definitely not always the easiest thing for me to bite my tongue when I see something that could be done, but it does make the weekends a lot more enjoyable. This weekend I'm headed home, and I cannot wait.

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